My Friend Passed Me Up— Lessons From Getting My Butt Kicked In Business

Gary Miller
4 min readJan 31, 2020

I talked to an old friend yesterday on the phone. We have short burst conversations on Facebook every now and again but it had been a while since we had a real-time, voice to voice chat.

I called him to eat crow.

My friend had passed me up in business. Big time.

He and I both started with very similar backgrounds. We cut our teeth in the same internet marketing/MLM company a half-decade ago. We sat in the same conferences and studied from the same teachers.

As strange luck would have it we both went on to work in life insurance. We even ended up in the same company and didn’t even know it at first.

A couple of years or so back, he left the company we were both in and went onto another insurance organization.

Fast forward to our telephone call, he’s stone-cold crushing it in his business. Legitimate, verifiable, results. He is light years ahead of where I am.

I called to congratulate him. He deserves it.

After the call, I had a lot of time on the road and I kept rolling around in my head what he had done to accelerate so far past me because there are lessons there. While there will be many that will say something like “Everyone is on their own journey”, there was no sugar coating this truth… I got my butt kicked and I wanted to know why.

Here’s what I think my friend did much better than me and how these things can help anyone go faster and bigger in their lives and business.

Strategy #1 — My Friend Found Something He Genuinely Liked To Do

Selling life insurance and recruiting agent to do so is lucrative but for many can be absolutely soul-sucking work. For my friend, he LOVES it. (all caps on purpose) Oh sure, there are things that annoy him just like anyone else, but he actually likes what he does… a lot. He’s all in for the mission and believes in it wholeheartedly. I’m not sure it was his passion when he started, but he found a way to take someone that can be mundane and antiquated and make it into something he could turn himself up to 10 for every morning. I tolerated and fought with the madness, he…



Gary Miller

Husband, father, insurance guy. Writing about life and leadership